Day One of the Rest of My Life

Okay, I've done it. I've negotiated this technical maze that I started so many years ago that I didn't remember my password. My husband is talking to me about something else so I can't quite listen to him and I can't quite concentrate on what I'm doing. What else is new? Now, if someone could just tell me exactly which of the many passwords I have in my head that actually turned this thing on, I'd be extremely grateful.

Day one of the rest of my life. Day 730 (or thereabouts) since I had a full-time job. It's not that I've held many full-time jobs. I've had a sort of freelance life. I wasn't raised to think I'd need anything more than that. I was raised to think that I would marry a doctor and attend luncheons. Oh yes, my mother will tell anyone who'll listen that she "begged me to be a teacher". I didn't want to be a teacher. Still don't, in the traditional sense. It's just that, well, like with anything that I do every single day, I get bored. But, for a time, I had full-time work. And I loved that paycheck!

I'm an actor. Oh, yeah, shake your head. I know. I'm also a director; a damned good one! I have insight and the ability to see beyond what's on the page, to the inner lives and motivations of characters, and then to translate them into actable suggestions for actors. Whoopee! That and (what is the fare now: $200?) will get you on the subway! Having been raised as I was, the thing I lack is not 'how to work when I get it' but 'how to get work'.

"Ask for what you want." This is the main lesson I can impart to my students. (Oh yes, I now teach acting. How's that for a laugh?) It's a good lesson and that hardest thing in the world for me to do myself. I could sell anything but myself. This pillow? (I'm sitting on my bed.) Why, this pillow is the only pillow you will ever need! It has memory! Put your head here and it will remember exactly where it was when you return to bed after your fourth trip to the bathroom. Just lie down softly. Hit this thing too hard and you could end up with a concussion. But sell 'ME"? Impossible. I wind up sounding desperate.

I love those who tell you to "have a :30 speech ready"; sum yourself up in a few words; etc. Are you truly interested in spending any time with someone who can sum himself up in :30? I have more variations than a Rubik's Cube. I'm an actor, writer, director and soon to be Hebrew School teacher. (That should be funny.) I've been an Executive Director, an Education Director, a producer, and so much more that Casting Director James Calleri looked at my resume and said, "You've lived many lives." And he was only looking at my acting credits!

So why am I here? And what will tomorrow bring? That is what I hope to explore. I hope you will be entertained as I reinvent myself one more time.